Young men and cars

wasps on some really lovely purple flower

Jim was up this weekend and we had a nice Vermont summer weekend. Porch time. Lazy time. Friend time. We went out to go pick blueberries on Sunday only to find that Jim’s car (a 2014 Corolla, an excellent car) just would crank and not turn over. We did the basic troubleshooting and none of it worked. We were trying to stay on top of it and not just wait and see if my mechanic could look at it on Monday, so we called a mobile mechanic. In all my years of car and truck ownership, I had somehow never done this before. I think I never thought I could afford it before? But we had more money than time and called the guy Yelp said might be good for this. About 40 minutes later a scruffy kid named Ray (I can somehow not stop calling him a kid despite the fact that he is a grown up father of two) with a huge tattoo that said BEOWULF on his arm and a Venmo that was @not_jesus_christ appeared at my place. We had sent him money for parts before he showed up–the parts store was on the way–and just seeing him was a relief.

He did a heroic amount of work on the car just right there in the street. Replaced the fuel pump which is a usual culprit. Changed out some relays. Probed and tested the electrical system. He got it running! But then it stalled after about 15 minutes. Which was a new data point. Restarting it led to a new noise. All more data. We were losing the light and every neighborhood dog walker and political canvasser had stopped by with opinions and advice. And we were paying the kid by the hour. Ray finally said he wouldn’t be able to get it going this evening, was really sorry about it. We said we’d probably take it to the mechanic tomorrow, and we started scenario-planning Jim’s car options (my truck which isn’t that comfy on long trips? take it to a dealer and pay through the nose? buy a new car on Monday?). We went to bed a little dejected.

Ray texted Jim at 11 pm “u up?” Jim was, in fact, up. Ray said he’d been thinking about the car all night, had some new ideas, if we hadn’t made a plan yet, could he try a few more things tomorrow? We said sure, why not? Paid for some more parts. He was here the good part of Monday. Seemed to know what he was doing but, I’ll be honest, I’m not sure I would have known if he wasn’t. Jim kept telling him to talk to me “She’s the one that knows more about cars” (true). The car lost a bunch of oil in one of the parts-changes and I started worrying about the neighborhood optics as well as Jim’s car future. Did I mention that Jim’s workplace was also laying off somewhere between 20-25% of their staff and he would find out that week if he was among them? (he wasn’t)

The last thing that Ray did was replace a timing belt tensioner something something and had to use RTV (a sort of gasket-maker sealant) for one of the gaskets which has to cure for 24 hours. Ray was pretty sure he had it fixed. Told us to start the car the next day and either it’s 100% fixed or it’s 100% going to drain all of its oil on to the road again and be pretty dead. We waited. We slept poorly. Before Jim was awake the next morning I went out with a friend and tried to turn the car on. It worked! When Jim woke up, I told him the good news. He drove home fine. The car’s still running fine. We gave the kid five stars on Yelp and Facebook. Turns out that Beowulf was his son’s name. Sometimes things work out.

coupon

View of the children's room in the library which features a table highlighting books about dinosaurs and has a rural mural on the wall including a field with cows and also a horse stall with a lifesize illustration of a horse in it.

People ask where I get my motivation and the answer, just like where I find my next book to read, is “It’s somewhat random.” I’ve been more of a homebody lately. It’s nice here and it’s summer and I have a porch. I do the usual things like watch the price of gas creep up. But! I got a coupon from my gasoline-buying app where instead of getting ten cents off a gallon, I’d get twenty-five cents. A bargain! But the coupon didn’t work. So I emailed the gas company to complain. They were responsive (shocker) and sent me a new coupon. But I already had a full tank of gasoline. So I decided to go on a drive.

I’ve been very slow-motion working on my Vermont 183 project where I go see all of Vermont’s libraries. Hannah did a high profile version of this recently and I don’t mind if people think I got the idea from her. I still have a few local-ish libraries to go to, so I chose Corinth and Strafford to go to next, since Vershire is only open a few days a week on a Saturday.

The drive to Corinth, in my same county, took me over three small mountains and took nearly an hour. This library, the Blake Memorial, was my local when I lived in Topsham a long time ago and it’s been greatly expanded since then. I’ve also (finally) become a person who is okay walking up to the library workers and saying “Hey I’m visiting libraries, what can you tell me about this one?” The library director at the Blake was new to the job and also went to the same library school as me. In Seattle. Her husband worked in tech and is now a carpenter. We had a lot to chat about. Two different people needed help with tech support while I was there and I helped one lady print an email. I stayed there so long that the library in Strafford was closed by the time that I left so I just drove home. I’d never taken a picture of this library before and now I had several.

It was an amazing day, every mountain road had an incredible view and it was hot and sunny without being broiling. I met a new person who seems neat and I got to check one more library off of my checklist, only 117 or something to go. Got out of the house. Had a story to tell. All because I had a coupon.

Jim, the musician

Jim and Todd and Boris playing music at an indie record store. Jim is playing Melodica

I knew when Jim and I started dating that he was a musician. Over time I learned that he could play nearly any instrument, that he has nearly perfect pitch, that his biodad was a working musician and that his musical tastes were as varied as the types of instruments that he played and collected.

Over the past five years he’s reconnected with his friend Todd from The In Out, the band Jim played with in the 90s, before he became a father and wasn’t in bands for a while. They’ve been playing together in each other’s living rooms for a bit and a few months ago, somehow, got a gig playing in a record store. I haven’t been to a record store music show (or even a record store) in quite a long time but I trucked down to Florence Massachusetts to go to Feeding Tube Records to see The In Out play their first gig in over a decade, the first time Jim’s played with them this century.

It was neat to just be in a weird record store, hang out with Matthew and Michelle, old friends from Hampshire, and get to see my best guy play eight or nine songs to an appreciative group of indie music aficionados. What a nice time.

On Hampshire

a set of shelves in the Hampshire College library

I don’t usually comment on the news here but people have been texting and emailing and messaging about the news that Hampshire was closing and I have a very specific thought and then some longer ones.

The specific thought is that I have wished, since the original “Hampshire is in trouble!” stuff started in 2018, that Hampshire could have just wrapped it all up with a bow at 50 years (in 2020) and just said “We did the stuff we set out to do, and now we are done.” I understand why they didn’t do that, but just to say I’ve been saying goodbye to Hampshire for a long time.

Hampshire made me into ME. I discovered that I loved library work while I was there, and that librarian jobs could be cool. I made a group of fast friends many of whom I am still in touch with regularly and who have all turned into really interesting, principled people. As someone who felt like a weird misfit in high school–I had friends and hobbies and whatnot, but the overall vibe of that place was not one I clicked with–I felt like I could mostly just be me at Hampshire. I had a lot of Jewish friends who informed me that I, too, was Jewish. I met people from different countries, classes, and backgrounds. I modeled for art classes. I helped lead a marching band to the St. Patrick’s Day Parade in Washington DC. I stayed involved politically and got to learn how to do so tactically and well. I wrote a lot, I met writers. I realized that my strengths as a writer were more expository and less imaginative, which was fine. I studied linguistics and wrote a thesis paper on the use of singular “they” (in 1990!). I didn’t do much there with computers, though I could have. I met the people who would eventually help me make the decision to move to Seattle, and later Vermont. I was the boring student who went there for four consecutive years and then graduated. An atypical Hampshire student. I lived on campus two out of the three summers I was there.

And then, once I graduated and moved away, my connection to the school faded. My communications from them were all about money. I had been a full tuition student, so was clearly on a list of “people with resources” but I think they really should have been talking to my dad. I didn’t understand class at all until I went to Hampshire. I decided it wasn’t worth me continuing to explain that to them, so I eventually stopped interacting with them, asked to be taken off of their mailing lists. I went back for occasional alumni events but more as a gate-crasher with local friends than as an attendee. I was invited to be on a panel of library workers there once. It was good to be in the library again (picture above).

My last interactions with them were a few months ago as I was trying to get my thesis into their digital Archives. I had a scanned version of my paper which I tried to upload (which involved reactivating my Hampshire College email from 40 years ago). There was a lot of tech support involved. However, because I was from an earlier decade, they needed a bound copy of the thesis as well. That’s where I hit a wall and hadn’t revisited Hampshire stuff since.

I have less of a sense of the loss to the world, of an America with no Hampshire College. There are similar places, but nothing is the same. I’m happy they didn’t have to “pivot to AI” in some stupid way like the academic homes of many of my friends. I’m pleased they didn’t get into an ugly wrestling match with the current administration which forced their hand. Above all, I am glad they were decisive, this time. There’s so much which is uncertain and kind of awful right now, especially the not-knowing. I will feel weird with a closed alma mater, though I always feel weird, but in some ways it’s better than having a might-be-closed-soon-but-who-knows one. I dream about the place a lot; that’s unlikely to change. Good for you Hampshire, you helped a lot of people become better people.

Photo of college graduation: Tim Shary, John Elstad, me, Lisa DeGrace, Scott Stockburger, Mike Singer, Joe Schloss, John Kitzen, Dave Wettengel

a poster from a Hampshire graduation which says DIVISION FREE in a typewriter font with a bouncy ball type illustration above it. It is green with yellow.

Eighteen Years

Me and Jim look into the camera. We are sitting in front of Walden Pond.

This is a picture of Jim and me at Walden Pond on our first anniversary which was seventeen years ago this past Sunday. He’s so great.

Tracy Kidder RIP

Black and white photo of Tracy Kidder and my dad both as young men talking in front of a room full of people
Tracy Kidder and my dad Tom West speaking to a room of people in 1983

A few people reached out to me after learning that Tracy Kidder died this week. I knew him when I was younger and he was friends with my dad who has been gone since 2011 so this has been an interesting time to be thinking back to the 1970s when everyone was alive and things were happening. This is a combination of a few things I wrote to people who have written to me this week. Continue reading

Voting Day 2026

a ballot made for children showing a race between Monkey and Robot. There is a writ-in line and a kid has written in "Gecko" and drawn a picture of one

I was correct, Saturday was the most-attended Town Meeting in a long time. I worked the polls at Voting Day, telling people how to put their ballot into the tabulator for six hours. It’s repetitive work, sort of calming really. You get to see everyone in town after a long snowy winter and while I wouldn’t call it fun exactly, I do enjoy it. My kid ballots (above) were a hit. There will be a write-up of the results in the newspaper this week because it’s that kind of town. It’s really the first election in a while where things just worked. No major “wrinkles to iron out” for next year.

I stayed to count the votes (one of the two candidates I was supporting won, the police ballot I was not supporting also won, the library budget did not pass but that was what we were hoping for) and then headed home full of free vote-counter pizza with my social batteries recharged. Already scheming for what we want to do next year. Here is a pretty small set of photos of the two days, since I was super busy.